Under Stormy Night, Tell Nobody

And the river got frozen,
And the hole got snowed in,
And the yellow moon glowed by
Til the morning light.

Fleet. Foxes. Are. Amazing.

I tend to do a lot of thinking as I'm walking around campus, especially over the bridges above the river. It's so big, and frozen. I can see the tracks from brave little animals that have crossed in the night. It's large, and looming, and frozen. But underneath it's still flowing. I think that describes me right now. I've got tough skin. My shattered emotions have built up around me and I'm almost impenetrable. Then, there's the rush of happiness I feel underneath when I breathe in the cold, crisp air, and look around at the beauty of my campus. It's beginning to really feel like my home away from home. MSU is such a rich, big, mini-city of its own. I can't imagine myself anywhere else. My roommates are hilarious, my friends are amazing, and I'm learning new things and pushing towards my goal of becoming a nurse. And it's all based on me, on what I do, and how I decide to pursue my dreams. I don't need anyone else to know that this is what I want, and this is where I want to be. I want everything for myself, everything that I deserve. I want to make a difference while I'm here. Hell, falling in love while I'm here would be amazing too. But mostly, I just want to do things for myself, and mold myself into who I aspire to be. I think I'm off to a pretty great start, boyfriend or no boyfriend, money or no money, big heart or no heart left to give to anyone. None of that really matters anymore. I've got amazing friends and family, and I've got what I need from myself inside; ambition, hope, and drive.


How can I give you the benefit, when all I have, all I have is doubt...?