Boy You're a Sight to See, Kinda Somethin` Like Me

I wonder if I keep talking about this really cool ass guy, will he keep calling me "gay" for it? Welp, I don't give a shit.
I love him. He's mine. I love him for so many reeeasons. I can't wait until the next time I see him, touch him, kiss him. Gaaaah I miss him! I don't even want to think about going back to school...

This was a decent ass Christmas for us to be broke. I ended up with $270 in cash and giftcards. WOOP. Also, Guitar Hero World Tour, undies, Ed Hardy perfume [I asked for Viva La Juicy, got that instead. Smells good though!], B&BW smell-good, and some other random stuffs. The food was AMAZING, as always! And seeing my family is always great. I'm just really glad to be here and have everyone happy and healthy and doing well, despite the state of the country. I'm pretty sure I've got a summer job at Ruby Tuesday if I want, since my uncle works there. All in all, shit's good.

On a different note, this Christmas felt bittersweet. I'm getting older. Legally, I'm an adult. I looked under our sparse little tree [decorated in green and white!] and saw about 3 things for me and my sister each. I immediately thought back to the days were there were 10 presents under the tree, along with huge ass, and I mean huge, git bags with even more gifts. I remember dollhouses and American Girl dolls and clothes, Bitty Babies and Barbies, clothes and video games, computer games and iPods, CDs and stereos. I remember when I could make my Christmas list a page long and get it all. This year I was lucky if I got the first thing on my list. I remember the complete and utter joy on me and my sister's faces. I remember screaming in such surprise and happiness that I needed hot chocolate more than I actually wanted it. Now I'm 18. This year I got cash, underwear and perfume. And even though the cash is what I wanted, I felt a pang because I wasn't surprised. I didn't scream in joy. I squealed upon opening GH World Tour, only because my mom had convinced me well enough that we weren't getting it. But the years have passed by me. I'm glad I remember them with such joy. But I'm sad they've passed. And Christmas won't probably be that much fun for me until I'm seeing the joy on my own children's faces years from now. I'm willing to wait for that though. I'm ready to be 19 next year. I'm ready to keep moving towards my future.